What to do about anger.

I haven't been too happy lately. I've been mad for the last couple of days and I really dont' know why I've been feeling like this. Normally I get mad, let things blow over, and move on. But now it's like I want to punch people iin the face for disagreeing with me, break things, throw things out windows, smash windows, and wreck stuff. I haven't done any of that yet..

I don't know what is stoping me from breaking stuff, but I'm kind of happy that I've haven't gotten in trouble. I wouldn't know what I would do if I got stuck between a rock and a hard place.


I think I need to find better outlets and things to do when I  get mad. Right now, listening to music hasn't really been helping. You know, you can only listen to happy songs for so long before they begin to stop. I tried punching soft things, but my right wrist is getting kind of weak and I really can't do to much with it.  I don't play my guitar or write when I'm mad because I realize that I might break my guitar! I don't want to do that!

I might get back into painting, or writing. I used to be really into these things a couple of years ago, but I just had to slowly quit because I just don't have the time to do it. I think that I need to find a job soon because I'm kind of tired of scraping up money from random places, and to be honest, I'm tired of doing odd jobs.

I'm going to go to bed now. I might not be getting enough sleep, but I really don't know what I want anymore.  I'll try to write some tomorrow, I'm staying late, so I'll try to sneak in a little bit of something.

Stress plus some.

I'm really stressed out right now. Today was just lame, I woke up and realized that it was Columbus day and I didn't have it off. I have a really bad headache and I'm worried about my classes and getting good grades in all of my classes before the end of the quarter, which is in about a week or so. If I keep my grades as is, I'll be somewhat happy, but what is so bad about upping your grades?

I'm not too concerned about the work load, but I'm more concerned about how my grades and how my health is doing. I've been hungry all day, my neck and shoulders till hurt, and I slept for about 14 hours yesterday. I'm just so exhausted, and I have no idea what to do. Most likely I'm going to go to bed early, and as soon as I'm done writing this, I'm going to go to bed an hour and a half early.  I'm sure that I can sleep easy tonight because I"m done with all of my homework and that stressor is gone.

I'm still wondering why my neck is still really messed up and why it cracks so much whenever I tilt it back. I think that I need to go to a doctor or chiropractor, but I'm kind of hateful when it comes to doctors. The last time I was going to go to a doctor I fractured my wrist playing tennis. Little did I know that I put my half broken wrist back into place when I was asleep, slept on it, and had a swollen wrist in the morning. I know that I should go to the doctor but when do I have time to?

I'm going to end it here so I can  write more later. Hopefully I will be feeling better by then.